Weddings, birthdays, dinner parties, and happy hours are events where people give toasts. We’ve all experienced incredibly touching toasts and we’ve cringed at the train wrecks, too. Great communicators are masters at honouring guests with toasts that are inclusive, entertaining and connective – here’s how to give a memorable toast.
Keep it short
Peoples’ attention spans are short. Remember that, at best, folks will remember one or two things from your toast; what the audience will absolutely remember is how you make them feel. So, with a few rehearsed, simple sentences and thoughtful words you can make a lasting impact.
Off-the-cuff toasts, like at your friend’s birthday party, should be less than one minute. The next toast that you give at a wedding should be less than three minutes. And when you raise your glass in honour of your beloved colleagues during Friday’s happy hour your words should last less than 20 seconds.
Be nice and authentic
Your toast should be about the person or people who are being honoured – it’s not about you. In this Globe and Mail article by Hadley Dyer comedian Sean Cullen says that you should keep your delivery light without trying to be Louis CK: “The problem with comedy and toasting is that everybody thinks they’ve got a great sense of humour, but often you should not try to be funny.” Speaking of which, Dyer recommends that you “toast, don’t roast” – this is your chance to shine a positive spotlight on friends or colleagues and an attempt at good natured ribbing can go very badly very quickly.
Success in toasting is often found in the moment, so simply think about a feeling or a specific experience that you want to highlight and go from there!
Tell a story
People remember stories. And we’re moved by good ones. According to the Wall Street Journal’s Rob Lazibnek, toasters often ramble through multiple anecdotes, frustrating listeners and giving the audience very little to take away from the experience. So pick a few tales that will stick – “let me tell you about the time that Kurt saved my life by outflanking the Sun…” or “Eric is the greatest colleague/roommate a guy could ask for because…” – and really focus peoples’ attention on how these examples reflect the subject’s (or subjects’) character.
Finally, if you have time to rehearse your toast, like for a wedding, remember that practice doesn’t make perfect, but perfect practice makes perfect. Rehearse your toast the way that you’ll deliver it for the big event (you’ll probably want to hold a glass).
Now get out there and give a memorable toast!